Sunday, 29 July 2018
Emma T3 W2
It had been raining all morning, and Lily and Jake were sitting on the old couch that was full of holes. Looking deep into each others eyes, they both knew they had to find something to do. So they grabbed a old pen and some paper, and wrote all the things they could think of. Laughing with tears of joy, they spent hours trying to think of something to do. When they finally gave up they realised that they had, had so much fun today. Trying to find something to do, when they had already been doing something really fun.
4 comments:
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I really like the way you described each piece of furniture, e.g 'siting on the old couch that was full of holes.
ReplyDeleteJust check your grammar, e.g maybe change the bit that says ' It had been raining all morning, AND... you could change it to 'It had been raining all morning, Lilly and Jake...
Nice work overall I really like you story.
I love the description you put into this story, it gives me a picture in my head. I would just check the last two sentences grammar.
ReplyDeleteNice work overall
DeleteI really liked the ending because in the end it a nice ending.
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