As I read the contents of the letter, I was aware of the smile on my face. " It's a boy" I shouted
"that's great" said Thomas "what did she name him?" " Rylie" I said "Rylie Mucker named after my late uncle." As I was telling sarge the great news there was a deep loud cry "everybody get down" so the hole platoon got down. You could hear something flying swiftly through the air. Run mate run were the last words I heard from my dear friend Thomas, the war had conquered some more lives.
I really like the way you said it's a boy that made me excited. Next time remember that every time a new person is talking it is a new line. Great job 👍😀
ReplyDeletea good story line. next time maybe change the last line.
ReplyDelete