Wednesday, 1 August 2018
Jackson - Week 2 Term 3.
It Had been Raining all morning. Boooorring! Untill a knock sounded, I’ve been told to never answer the door if Mother or Father wasnt home. So I ddn’t. But they kept knocking. The sound drifing throughout the house. I was anxious. Very anxious. A smash. I dashed for my phone. I continuesly pressed te power button, SOS mode had to activate soon. “No… No… No…” I mumbled. It was flat. I tryed again. It buzzed to life. The screen counted down. Dead.. It died right in frount of me. I was mortifyed. “There’s Someone Home!” A loud Bang drifted off.
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Good piece of writing, next time be more descriptive and try to make it make more sense.
ReplyDeleteI would check my spelling like; "Until", "The". And the grammar on "Wasn't". Well written.
ReplyDeleteI really liked how you put sound effect words into your writing.
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