Thursday, 2 August 2018
Josefs 100WC T3W2
It had been raining all morning so i was happy to finally go outside when it cleared up. But when I got outside everything in the garden seemed to be melting. I knew things were really wrong when our rain gutter started melting. it must have been the rain. Oh no it was starting to come back on I raced back inside. The rain continued strong. Suddenly the ceiling collapsed. The rain broke the roof, it began to touch me, it felt like hot lava. There was nothing i could shelter under. It would not stop... until The rain stopped.
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Josef i really liked that piece of writing because of it's gripping itenseity. Try to make it a little more detailed next time.
ReplyDeleteJosef I really like how you ended this piece of writing with a cliffhanger, It makes me want to read more.
ReplyDeleteJust remember to use capital I's
Josef I like the way you ended the story and used descriptive words.
ReplyDeleteJust remember to use capital I's not lower case I's.